I was an overworked cop trying to get off the streets. I was also a mediocre entrepreneur who’d had moderate success but nothing great. At the time, I really wanted to join the hostage negotiations team so I could find some meaning in my work and have a better schedule. What I wanted even more was to grow my side business into something significant so I could quit my job as a cop.
Imagine you’re doing one thing but inside you have a deep desire for more. You feel like you’re on the verge of what could be great but you’re falling just short of your potential. That was my life too!
I wanted to be able to create a business that impacted people’s lives and provided for my family so I would never miss another moment with the people that matter most.
Since my business hadn’t grown like I wanted, I decided to apply for the hostage negotiation team because If I had to work a traditional job I wanted to feel like I was making a difference. Have you ever felt like you’ve settled for the next best thing because the thing you really want just doesn’t seem possible? I’d gotten really good at settling for less.
The thing is when I applied for the open position the interview didn’t go well. As part of the interview, I had to do a simulated negotiation with a real person. I negotiated with a man who was on a bridge and preparing to jump.
Imagine you just prepped the presentation of your life. You thought you said all the right things. You hit all the key points. You walked out confident, knowing you did everything you could do. That’s how I felt. I was sure I had nailed the interview.
I did everything I thought I should do. I talked to him, told him all the right things, and kept talking even when he ignored me. Following the interview, a mentor of mine gave me the truth about my interview. She said, “The man who played the person on the bridge said, ‘If that guy would have showed up and I was really in crisis…I would have jumped.’”
When was a time, you finally had a little hope only to have it ripped from you?
I felt terrible because I not only was I struggling to build my real dream business, but I was so bad at talking to people at my job that I made a normal person want to jump off a bridge. This made my hopes of ever creating the life I want seem to vanish.
BUT… for some reason, the hiring team saw something in me and decided to bring me on the team.
I learned quickly that my problem wasn’t talking. I was a great talker. The problem was learning to listen.
For the next year, I learned everything I could about listening, building rapport, and negotiating. I practiced on my family, my friends, and in every situation I could. I attended every training and read every book I could find. And I negotiated on the job whenever the team needed me.
Your potential for your dream isn’t limited by your current reality. It’s only limited by your willingness and commitment to grow. Your next client is on the other side of your growth. Your next sale will develop as you develop personally.
After all that growth and work, something amazing happened
One night I was walking in the door from a family day when my work phone went off. The text notified me of a man standing on a bridge who wouldn’t talk to anyone. I immediately flashed back to the day I made a man want to jump.
The situation was the same in every way except one. I was different. I had grown.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
Can you see yourself being given a second chance at your big break after 3 years of growing and learning? How would you feel as you walked through the door toward that second chance?
I used every skill I had learned over the past year and after 6 hours talking on a bridge, the man stepped down off the railing and walked to my partner and I. His words, “Thank you.”
In that moment I realized with the right tools and training, I could connect with anyone and any time.
And that’s when it hit me…
If I could connect with a man on a bridge then I could do the same with my ideal clients. And I could help you do the same.
I could start more clients I wouldn’t have to TELL them anything but instead could help them get what they wanted by listening and connecting with them?
It was now crystal clear to me how to start and maintain more clients in my business because I knew how to build rapport with anyone at anytime and help them get what they wanted.
I also learned that when you get to the heart of someone’s story you can take any hostile environment like sales and create immediate trust.
Because of this I began using these skills with my current clients, business partners, and my business began to grow at a rapid pace. More clients, more referrals, and my business partners began to notice a change.
Suddenly, I was having people reach out to me wanting to know what I did, how I learned it, and could I teach them to do the same.
That’s when I realized that the secret to building my business in a new way.
My plan was to bridge the gap between where my ideal clients were and where they wanted to be through a simple process. So many people want to make a difference but see influence or sales as disingenuous or shady. It took me a year of deep learning to understand all the skills to build a real connection and quickly develop influence.
So even though these skills were working for me, it was about helping others achieve success and feel good about what they were doing for their clients with their products and services.
I realized as my inbox filled with more and more conversations, a very specific pattern emerged. It was a pattern I could teach to multiple people and worked no matter what type of business a person was developing.
That’s when I created “The Bridge Method.” It’s process that bridges the gap between you and your people you want to serve through heroic influence.
With the bridge method you don’t have to chase customers and clients down or pull them to you and your products and services.
Instead, you build four pillars and a path and empower your customer to come to you. Each pillar of heroic influences builds the bridge. And within each pillar you learn the triggers and hooks that will empower your client to choose you. They then become the hero of the story as they take each step.
After learning these skills of heroic influence, I have not only been able to build my business in addition to other streams of income, but I’ve helped my business partners expand their businesses exponentially at higher rates than ever.
The tools of the bridge method change the way I lead and help in such a way, I was able to retire from my job and live life on my terms which is awesome. But even more exciting is how this very method can work for anyone willing to make someone else the hero.
The bridge method is the foundation of any area of your life that you desire influence. I've used these pillars to bridge the gap in my parenting, my social life, and my marriage. Influence is the ability to lead others in a way that affects change. Heroic influence is a bridge builder who uses the power of influence for the good of others. This is the greatest cause!
Bridge Builder Challenge
What if you could start bridging the gap between you and your future clients to become a heoric influence in their lives? What if the difference between your success in failure is the net question you ask?